The “Cabin Fever” NE GA Swap Meet is this Saturday, May 2 at the Atlanta Dragway in Commerce, GA!

1. Our staff that’s directly interacting with spectators and vendors will have rubber gloves. They will also wear face masks, or be behind windows.
    
2. We are switching from our regular paper tear-off tickets, to wrist bands. Please make sure to put them on, not just in your pocket or on your dashboard—we’ll be using these specifically so we don’t have to use hand-stamps to let people re-enter the show. We’ll hand you the wrist band, but we won’t put it on you—we’ll need you to do that, and you’ll need to do it before entering through the spectator gate.
   We’ll also need you to catch as much wrist-hair in the adhesive as you can, as though we were putting it on you. Your co-operation on the wrist-hair is greatly appreciated.

3. In order to minimize back-and-forth contact points, we’re asking that everybody please make a special effort to have exact change for your entries; this will eliminate someone handing us money, and then us handing it back out to other people. $30 for Priority Vendor, $20 for Vendor General Admission, $6 for each spectator. Vendors get one helper in for free. Anybody else in the car is $6 each.
    
4. We will have signs at the entry gates listing the symptoms of COVID-19… because after four months of hearing about nothing but, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, apparently Small Business Owners are the last line of defense in saving the human race by once again telling everyone what the symptoms are, on signs at our entry points… so I’m buying signs to put up. Make me feel like it’s worth it and at least glance in their general direction on your way through the gates.
    
5. Your temperature: I’m still investigating whether or not we have to get the temperature of people coming in the gate. I DO have to take the temperatures of our workers before they start interacting with you, and obviously none of my workers with symptoms will be working at the show.
   If we DO end up taking participant’s temperatures, it’s gonna be with one of those lazer pointer temperature guns guys use to check the temp on slicks and radiators.
   Probably.
   Option 2 is rectal thermometers, self-administered of course, but that’s probably not real practical, and will just lead to a whole bunch more hassles than its worth, including Hostile Environment lawsuits and more…  I’m leaning heavily toward the laser gun thing. Plus I’ve always wanted one for the shop, so… (Oh shut up! Two-thirds of you have made the same joke when talking about getting your temperatures taken at businesses!)
    
6. Face Masks: The Georgia State Government’s guidelines SUGGEST everyone wear face masks while out in public. They do not require it. We are complying with all of the State’s requirements, and not creating our own. All my reading and research indicates masks do not protect YOU from GETTING the virus, it helps protect you from spreading it to others, so use your own discretion.
   I’m still deciding what kind of mask to wear in public, and have it narrowed down to Clown, or Hockey.
    
7. If you opt to wear a mask, and we can all still see your nostrils, you’re doing it wrong. Just pointing that out, because in the last week I’ve seen it more than I would have ever imagined. (There’s a lot of people who have taken themselves out of the running for Mensa nominations is all I’m saying. A LOT of people…)
    
8. Sneezing.
   Anybody who’s ever worked in restaurants knows how to sneeze. For those who’ve never worked in the food service industry, here’s the procedure:
   Rear your head back, eyes squinted shut, nose wrinkled, mouth wide open but lower jaw tight.
   There’s a split-second pause between The Windup and The Pitch.
   During that split-second, cock one of your shoulders up a bit and turn your head towards it, then let fly. Your shoulder will catch the brunt of it, and you won’t cover your hand in Yuck, spray your neighbors, or cover vendor’s parts for the next guy to pick up. (All the Covid Procedure sites are mentioning sneezing, but I defy you to find a better, more thorough description or process… Proving we here at the NE GA Swap Meet will always go the extra mile… no matter how ridiculous)
    
9. Sneezing While Wearing a Mask
   I have NO idea how that’s gonna work, but if you’re wearing a mask and feel one coming on, make sure to have your friend shoot video on their cell phone, because it’s gonna be hilarious.
    
10. Hand Sanitizer. If you have your own pocket-sized bottles, bring it and use it throughout the day.
    I’ve ordered two cases of 12-oz pump bottles, and will have a bottle set up at the top end of each row, on an up-ended 55-gallon barrel.
    The track manager is also installing hand sanitizer dispensers in the restrooms.
     
11. Bathroom Attendant: We’ll have a bathroom attendant policing the bathrooms throughout the entire event. She will be spraying down the counters and fixtures with the CDC-recommended bleach solution. For privacy concerns, she’ll shut the gate/doors of the bathroom she’s cleaning, so just use the other buildings while she’s giving that one the Ten Second Tidy. Yeah, it’s a pain, but waddya gonna do?
     
12. The phrases “An abundance of Caution” and “We’re All In This Together” are expressly forbidden anywhere on the property throughout the duration of the event.  Anybody heard uttering these phrases is liable to be hit in the mouth with a cylinder head.
     
13. Everyone knows the 6 Food Rule… our walking aisles are two cars wide, and our vendors get as much space as they want, so we don’t have to worry about them being stacked on top of one another like they are at other shows. If we can all walk through the grocery store aisles and maintain 6 feet of distance, we should all have no problem maintaining 6 feet at the swap meet. At the spectator ticket window, we’ll probably have two windows open to keep people from bunching up.
     
14. Sunlight is being touted as knocking out the virus very quickly—Seriously. Saturday’s weather is supposed to be sunny and perfect, so keep it in mind! (I’d say “come to the swap meet for your health!” but people believe Trump told them to drink fish tank cleaner and swallow Lysol to beat the virus, and I’d rather not open myself up to litigation from the people who need warning labels to tell them not to use electric hair driers while taking a shower, so I won’t say it.)